Details Details Details

Driving to work today I saw in large letters under a Dunkin Donuts sign, "ICE TEA." Seems harmless enough. Except for that fact that it's iced tea. Minor detail, right? I thought to myself, it's just Dunkin Donuts. That got me thinking however what that missing detail communicates about that "food" retailer. It's the ability to pay attention to detail that makes for good service and good products. Does anybody really care anymore?

This issue is much larger than Dunkin Donuts ice tea. The inability to mind such a visible detail suggests that the management at this location is also missing a lot of other details. When you're talking about something you're meant to put into your mouth, you don't want to imagine to what failing to pay attention may lead.

Someone I know has suggested that there is a real leadership issue in our culture. Nobody wants to accept the responsibility to lead. So, how about leading by example? It seems this approach is also lacking appeal. The best example of this can be seen on tv news shows (I use shows because reports suggest journalism which, in turn, suggests journalistic integrity and integrity has nothing to do with advertising revenue). Over the past decade or so, television reporters have systematically abandoned their posts as leaders by example. These mockers of journalism have also been reduced to mockers of our very language.

Grammar may not seem important, because, at the end of the day it really doesn't put food on the table or pay the rent. The ability to communicate clearly, on the other hand, makes life easier for everyone. Plus, if you're up for a job against someone who can communicate better and more clearly than you but who is less qualified, do you really think you stand a chance? Well, that is food on the table and rent. Moreover, in a climate where people are abhorrent to offend anyone, the ability to articulate sounds like a genuine survival skill-- particularly for someone in the public eye.

It seems that less and less often, people in a position to make a difference are willing to accept the responsibility of their status to lead by example. From athletes to television personalities, any cheap trick for attention precedes, as they say in the vernacular, "representing." I can sum this up in two names: Paris and Britney.

There are of course, great exceptions to this decline. I have to give Oprah kudos for her work, her demeanor, her deportment (does anyone have a clue what this even is?) and her enthusiasm for promoting literature. Ironically, I cannot claim to be an Oprah fan. I do however respect her. She commands respect and more importantly, she teaches people about self respect. She makes it look so easy.

Recently, medical or statistical evidence of how having overweight or athletic friends directly influencing our weight and activity levels caused quite a stir. Why does anyone think that it stops with weight? How you present yourself gives people around you license to present themselves as well or as poorly. If you're in the spotlight, this is doubly true.

So to all of you celebs whether you're local tv personalities or film actors or musicians or athletes, try for one minute of every hour to consider your status as a leader. Remember that every time you appeal to the lowest common denominator, you're lowering the standards for everyone. And to all of you people who don't notice your employees are exemplifying ignorance in your signage, well, good luck with that.

Laissez les mourchoirs roule!

Today is Mardi Gras. And I have a cold. So in keeping with the Mardi Gras theme I have entitled this entry in James French. Any resemblance to genuine French is purely a coincidence (some restrictions apply; void where prohibited; except in Quebec).

As my title suggests, I am cozied up to a box of Kleenex brand's most soothing tissues. I am disconcerted however by the lack of instructions on the package. Instructions on shampoo bottles are legendary. Why not "facial" tissues? From all of the people I've seen wiping their noses on their sleeves at Disney, I would venture to guess that the average American lacks proper nose-blowing knowledge. Consequently, I shall most magnanimously offer the following as my suggestion for instructions. Even better, I'm not union so Kleenex is free to use them without risk of upsetting collectively bargaining writers.

1. Remove one Kleenex(R) Lotion Tissue with aloe and vitamin E from box.
2. Using both hands, cover nostrils with tissue.
3. Press against edge of nostrils without obstructing airways.
4. Honk like a Canadian goose.
5. Wipe remaining liquid from nostrils, upper lip, hands and desk with Kleenex (R) Lotion Tissue with aloe and vitamin E before discarding.
6. Wash hands. We don't want our germs to spread.

We really don't want our germs to spread. And speaking of germs, the soccer ball type thing is my germ. It's a rhinovirus, or common cold, and it even looks like something that would make you sneeze if you got one caught in your nose.

Meanwhile, let us not forget that it is Mardi Gras, which happens to be a paper napkin rather than a facial tissue. Admittedly when I set about this task, I was hoping to find that Georgia Pacific did indeed manufacture facial tissues under the Mardi Gras brand name however that would have worked out far too easily. The cold was merely a coincidence.

P.S. If all of this has been too graphic for you, dear readers, I apologize. If you are a Canadian goose fancier or are from Quebec, you have my deepest sympathy. I do, after all, have a cold and cannot be held fully accountable for my actions.