By Halloween, Dolly Parton's Dixie Stampede (part dinner show, part redneck circus) already had their 4 story Christmas tree up between it and the exhausted Interstate 4. The I-4 as it is affectionately called (generally followed by series of expletives) is marked as running East and West which in places it does. Orlando, however is not one of these places. Here, the I-4 pretty much runs North to South which explains the proximity of the Dixie Stampede to it.
Dolly. Who doesn't LOVE Dolly? I know I do. In fact, I once named one my cars, Jolene. So, of course, I'm perfectly content to see her 7 foot high smiling face on the Dixie Stampede video sign flickering high upon the steeple. A smile from Dolly is a great start and a comfort to anyone unlucky enough to travel the I-4. I am a bit taken aback however when in mid-October she appears on the flickering screen in my living room announcing that Christmas is her faaavorite time of year and how nobody does it better than her adoring children at the Dixie Stampede. She even backs her claim of the best Christmas celebration (without alcohol) in Orlando with a guarantee (you must smuggle your own alcohol in-- I use must here as an imperative rather than a declarative-- if I had to do it over again thing).
It's important to mention that here we measure out our year by events rather than seasons. We only have 2 seasons here: hurricane season and not. Consequently, to see a Christmas tree up before the end of October is as disorienting to us as the complete lack of seasons is to our newly arrived neighbors.
So, Dolly, as much as I love you, you're fattening the goose a bit early this year. Christmas is coming no matter what. I can guarantee.
